Letting go

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I think George Michael sang it best when he sang “if love me say you love me, but if you don’t just let me go”. Recently Amelie’s ex boyfriend has been calling her and she’s considering going back to him because they have history. Granted when they were happy together in the beginning, but towards the end, they made each other miserable. Maybe they should just let each other go and explore, maybe they’ll be much happier in the end by not being attached.

My latest fortune got me to thinking about all of the attachments that we have. I’m attached to my family and friends which is great, but they think of me as one way and sometimes can stifle my growth as a person. They don’t do it on purpose and I’m sure that I’m guilty of the same thing, we all are. Sometimes we hold onto people and things because we’re afraid, we make assumptions that change is bad.

It’s easier to settle into familiar routines seeing the same people day in and day out because we know what to expect. Amelie might be guilty of this. She is thinking about going back into a relationship that’s not fulfilling her needs, even though there might be something better for her out there. It’s the same with things, we become emotionally attached to things trying to fill some type of void, when sometimes it’s better to just let go.

Earlier this summer I let go of the things I was hoarding, it was just stuff that I had formed attachments with, and once I let it go my space felt better. I felt better, lighter somehow. So to continue that trend and to become more generous with myself I’m letting go of my bad habits and my toxic relationships. I will let go of the frenemies that I’ve made along the way. I will let go of everyone who wants to pigeonhole me into this mold of what they think I should be.

I’ll also let go of the bad dates that I had recently in hope to find someone better, like maybe Eric. He’s only 2 years older and hopefully being honest about everything he’s written to me. So far we’ve had a lot of nonstop texting through the site and I like him. I like his sense of humor and adventure based on what he’s told me. We’ve decided that we’re going to meet up sometime over labor day weekend since neither one of us has plans and this weekend will most likely be a wash-out thanks to tropical storm, soon to be hurricane, Isaac.

In the spirit of this fortune I promise to take whatever relationship I fall into with whomever slowly, not smothering anything before it starts. Hopefully this is not just velleity, my word of the day.

More then lottery numbers…

Since I’ve been trying to take the advice of these little cookies for a few weeks now I figured it would be nice to do a little research on them…

Did you know that fortune cookies were actually a Japanese not Chinese invention? Fortune cookies are said to have originated in Kyoto, Japan somewhere around the 19th century. Omikuji as they were/are called would carry a general blessing and fortune about some area of a person’s life. Then some time between late 1890 to early 1900s they were introduced to the US by way of California and later modified to look more like what we’ve come to know as a fortune cookie. Somewhere along the way they became a staple in Americanized Chinese restaurants and contained sayings and advice from all over including Confucius and the bible to name a few.

Who knew?

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Everything that irritates us about others can les us to understanding about ourselves.

So in keeping with my fortune cookie theme I’ve decided to look at all of the little behaviors that have been irritating me lately and see if I can overcome them and see the bright side of things.

My sister and her constant meddling makes me crazy, because she trying to replace my deceased parents. My parents had me later in life and both passed away, I think that’s she feels responsible for me and my brothers since she’s the oldest and she worries.

Amelie seems to need constant attention from her friends now, she won’t just sit down and deal with what’s going on.

My older brother Marc seems to think that I’m wasted my life and constantly feels the need to criticize everything that I do. He makes me feel like an irresponsible child instead of a growing adult, who’s still learning.

His twin, my brother, Jason is the one that only calls family when he needs something.

I find most of my coworkers to be lazy and unwilling to do our jobs, which none of us really likes, but that we’re all getting paid for.

Jillie has a free spirit that annoys me as much as I love it, in fact it’s one of her best qualities.

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The same can be said about all of the aforementioned, I like to think that my family loves me and my sister’s meddling and my brother’s critiquing are done because they care. I love them and if Jason proves anything it’s that you help out the people you care for in the best way you know how.Both Jason and Amelie teach me that everyone heals in their own way. My coworkers always remind me of what not to do on the job, and are inspiring me to find a new job.

So while I’m sure that there are a lot more things about family, friends, and coworkers that irritate me, I take this fortune to remind me not to judge others so harshly and to remember that we’re all human. Also, to point out all of the qualities that irritate me, would make me feel judgmental, thereby making me irritated with myself. So this fortune also reminds me that we all see things differently and that there are two sides to everything.

Rub a dub dub….

So after a miserable day at work my friend, Amelie, invited me to work out at her complex since they offer free fitness classes in the gym for residents. She wanted to work out and vent due to an argument with her boyfriend and on Wednesday nights they offer a “Yo-Pilates” class that actually makes you hurt the next day. We ended up having a grueling work out followed by girl talk over green iced tea.

As much as I would love to be in a relationship now, I know I’m a mess and listening to her made me wonder why she was in one as well. While I’m sure he has his good points, her latest rant makes him sound like a control freak who’s possible cheated on her. Why stay with someone like that? Of course I kept my mouth shut and didn’t voice that question but still…

This is why most of your friends and family members don’t like the people you date and marry, you tell them about all of the things they do to hurt you. I’m sure in Amelie’s case he’s done some pretty nice things or else they wouldn’t be dating, especially considering how picky she is.

Anyway, after the work out and girl talk I decided to follow-up on my latest fortune:

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So tonight I’m going to have the tub and sometime this weekend I’m going to use my gift massage. Would you believe that I’ve never had a massage before? It always seemed too indulgent to buy one for myself, but my sister gave me one for my birthday in March, and the fortune cookie reminded me that I had it. I’m sure my muscle are going to hurt tomorrow, so bath for now and I’ll tell you how the massage goes later.

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