To be continued

I’ve missed the online WordPress community and my blog, who knew that e-dating would take up so much time. Between the messaging, the phone calls and the meeting in person online dating feels like a full-time job. Unfortunately none of my prospects have yielded any results, in fact they remind me why I haven’t dated in a while.

There was my disaster date Eric who seemed like a nice guy whom I’d have a lot in common with since we had great phone conversations. I pulled up to the restaurant that we were meeting at a little after him and saw him spray himself with a horrible smelling baby powder cologne. It went completely downhill from there. He kept texting someone else on our date, then again I didn’t want that smell to rub off on me. If it weren’t for Eric I never would have believed Ami’s theory on smell.

Ami claimed that unless you like the way a man or woman smells its doomed for the start. She said that there have been several studies on the subject and that your perfect partner will have a scent all their own despite cologne and lotions. Then there was something about smell and chemistry, but you’d need to talk to her on that subject.

My next bad date was meeting for drinks, with a guy who was recently divorced, and seemed like hated women because of it. He basically cursed his ex-wife through out our whole date even telling me that she got pregnant on purpose. Strangely enough he wanted to go to dinner afterwards.

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After that there were a couple of just ok dates and there was one bright spot, Jason. Jason was cute and fun, he even wore purple. Our first date was a bowling date and he was ok with me beating him. I’m not the type of girl who will just let a guy win or act stupid, but you don’t want to hear about that. Jason physically was my perfect type of guy, great height and not too skinny, not too fat. His arms looked like they’d be perfect for hugs and cuddling. He made me laugh so much during bowling that I even agreed to go to dinner.

At dinner Jason and I laughed and joked all while getting to know each other, it didn’t even have an awkward interview feel. He flirted and I flirted and there was a tiny little kiss at the end of the date which gave me butterflies. We’ve agreed to see each other again, instead of saying he’ll call me he actually made plans for another date and yes I will wear purple….

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Letting go

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I think George Michael sang it best when he sang “if love me say you love me, but if you don’t just let me go”. Recently Amelie’s ex boyfriend has been calling her and she’s considering going back to him because they have history. Granted when they were happy together in the beginning, but towards the end, they made each other miserable. Maybe they should just let each other go and explore, maybe they’ll be much happier in the end by not being attached.

My latest fortune got me to thinking about all of the attachments that we have. I’m attached to my family and friends which is great, but they think of me as one way and sometimes can stifle my growth as a person. They don’t do it on purpose and I’m sure that I’m guilty of the same thing, we all are. Sometimes we hold onto people and things because we’re afraid, we make assumptions that change is bad.

It’s easier to settle into familiar routines seeing the same people day in and day out because we know what to expect. Amelie might be guilty of this. She is thinking about going back into a relationship that’s not fulfilling her needs, even though there might be something better for her out there. It’s the same with things, we become emotionally attached to things trying to fill some type of void, when sometimes it’s better to just let go.

Earlier this summer I let go of the things I was hoarding, it was just stuff that I had formed attachments with, and once I let it go my space felt better. I felt better, lighter somehow. So to continue that trend and to become more generous with myself I’m letting go of my bad habits and my toxic relationships. I will let go of the frenemies that I’ve made along the way. I will let go of everyone who wants to pigeonhole me into this mold of what they think I should be.

I’ll also let go of the bad dates that I had recently in hope to find someone better, like maybe Eric. He’s only 2 years older and hopefully being honest about everything he’s written to me. So far we’ve had a lot of nonstop texting through the site and I like him. I like his sense of humor and adventure based on what he’s told me. We’ve decided that we’re going to meet up sometime over labor day weekend since neither one of us has plans and this weekend will most likely be a wash-out thanks to tropical storm, soon to be hurricane, Isaac.

In the spirit of this fortune I promise to take whatever relationship I fall into with whomever slowly, not smothering anything before it starts. Hopefully this is not just velleity, my word of the day.

Let the games begin

Online dating should come with a warning label, beware of what you might meet.
I heard from friends that people don’t tell the truth on their profiles, but wow. My latest fortune told me to “do something unusual tomorrow” so I had two dates scheduled for this past weekend I read their profiles and we chatted for a bit, but they were nothing like their profiles.

For starters I’d like to date someone close to my age, I think I’d have more in common with a guy in his twenties maybe early thirties, then with someone I their forties. It is not meant to be an ageist type of thing, it’s just that I’m trying to get myself established. I’m just starting to stand on my own two feet and I’d prefer not to hear when I was your age from the guy I date.

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Bachelor number one completely lied about his age. We had a date scheduled for Friday, nothing big, just drinks and maybe some tapas. The restaurant choice was perfect. I’ve always wanted to go to Spain and this place was styled after a Spanish restaurant complete with flamenco dancers. My clothes made me feel good, I was having a very good hair day and my shoes were cute and comfortable. So far everything sounds good only my date was supposed to be in his twenties and was old enough to have a twenty year old.

It was already off to a bad start and I was trying to be polite and at least have one drink, when he said the words, “when I was your age….”. Yuck, that sounds like something my dad would have said when he was alive. On a bright note I did find a new restaurant that I like and will definitely have to go back to.

The second guy well, he just seemed nothing like the guy online. The guy that I chatted with online seemed outgoing and his profile made him sound like someone who likes to be active. The guy that I met for brunch on Sunday was quiet, and by quiet I mean getting him to talk was like pulling teeth. He said he liked camping and the outdoors, but the last time he went was when he was 10. He loved sports, only hadn’t played any since high school unless you include video games. He seemed like a nice guy but we really didn’t have anything in common in person.

I know I’m not perfect and actually can admit most of my faults very easily, but I’m honest. My online profile has my real age, my real body type (curvy, I’m still working on getting rid of 20 pounds), and my real activities, minus the blog. I admit I had a few rough years and am paying for them. I admit I’m still working on the while budget thing and was actual very close this month. I admit I haven’t found my dream job but I had an idea for a few children’s books, however I digress. Based on this weekend I’ll be single for a little while longer. All I can say is that I hope my dates get better, although bad dates would be perfect to write about, so stay tuned more to come.

Dream a little dream….

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“Find many dream boxes. Ask a friend to select one. Then dream together” was what my last fortune read well now I love my girlfriends and my guy friends but I think that it’s time for me to start dating again so that I have someone to dream with. When I was younger I planned on being married by the time I turned twenty-five and unfortunately, or fortunately depending on how you look at it, that dream didn’t work out. I was engaged twice, but couldn’t take the plunge.

With the first guy I was engaged to we knew it was a mistake as soon as we moved in together, we were too young and hadn’t finished college. With fiancé number two, I can only say that we had different ideas on marriage and dating, I wasn’t up for an open marriage and don’t share certain things very well. That being said I think that I am ready to share my life with someone, so I’ve opened an account on one of the online dating sites.

My handle is “1985Mermaid” and I can’t wait to see what bites. I thought the mermaid thing was cute considering my name and I needed something easy to remember. To help me write a bio, one of my friends gave me this great site which almost writes your ad for you like a mad lib, despite what you might think I really suck at talking about myself. The picture choosing was the fun part. Amelie‘s done this before and told me to use some action shots, while my friend Sam said close up, just me and no bathing suits. I ended up using a shot from last Halloween and another singing karaoke.

The picture might change, but what I’m looking for probably won’t. I’d like to find a partner, and I still dream of getting married and having kids before hitting thirty-five. The other thing I dream about is finding a new job preferably something that’s a bit more creative. I guess it’s time to let myself dream again.

Rain, rain go away…

 

 

I hate to say that I’m a fair weather friend, but honestly there are times that I just want to stay in because it’s raining. Before anyone tries to pass judgement keep in mind I live in Florida where rain is usually accompanied by thunder and it’s slightly more dangerous friend, lightning.

While Florida is not the lightning capital of the world, Rwanda has that distinction, Florida is considering to be the lightning capital of America. My state doesn’t lead the list of per capita deaths by lightning strikes, last time I checked New Mexico topped that list. We rank somewhere around fifth, but still a lot of people die from that and I hope not to be one of them.

No going to yoga because of the long walk from Amelie‘s apartment to the clubhouse. Also not in the mood for ladies night at the cowboy place, since the floor would already be muddy even before most people have a chance to spill their drinks on it. So that means I’m staying in, either a good book or a video.

Times like these I miss having someone to cuddle up with on the couch and watch a movie. Of course I’m sure that my muffin top doesn’t need the popcorn and soda that would surely compliment the movie, it would still be nice. It’s been awhile since I’ve had a boyfriend though, I decided to give myself a break after my last relationship failure.

My friend Sam met his girlfriend through one of those online sites and Jilly has always gone out on dates from there, up until recently. I think that she met her boyfriend no one of those sites but I can’t remember, I’ll have to ask her. Maybe since I’m stuck in tonight I’ll try my hand at online dating. I hope I can find someone with a nice smile, who will like my smile.

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